What Do You Do?

Do you ever get the dreaded question from other moms..."So, what do you do for a living?"

When we first started homeschooling...WAY back in the day...I would timidly respond with, "I'm a stay at home mom." Then either they would change the subject quickly or respond with "Oh me too!" followed by, "Maybe we can go have coffee or something while the kids are in school." My first thought would be.."huh, that's a great idea but what do I do with my children? "OH SNAP! I didnt say we homeschool...How do I get out of this?" Followed by, somewhat embarrassed, "Well, we homeschool so... I'm not sure how that would work." The conversation would awkwardly end and we would go on our way.

When I did find a family that homeschooled, desperately, I jumped on them like white on rice! Almost obsessively seeking their friendship.  I may have been a bit creepy! LOL

After I started gaining more confidence in our "new" lifestyle, I would go the opposite way in conversations with new encounters...Them, "So, what do you do for a living?" Me, (overly excited and terribly prideful) "WE HOMESCHOOL!!!! I AM A STAY AT HOME MOM! I HOMESCHOOL ALL OF MY CHILDREN ALL OF THEM!!"  Then I would go into a short dissertation on how, they too, can homeschool if they just tried. The shock looked on their faces would tickle me to no end. But in the end, I still had not gained a new friend nor the acceptance of my lifestyle. (wonder why it took so long to find friends?)

So, as time went on, I began to find more and more people that homeschooled. Honestly, it was like looking for a needle in a haystack! I attended our local homeschool workshops in hopes of finding new friends for me and our children and acceptance. We did find families to do things with, but I wanted more! I wanted permanent long lasting "best" friends. It just wasn't happening the way I wanted it to!!

During this desert time, I began to doubt my calling and draw close to God; frankly, because I was lonely!  Over time, He showed me my heart. I was "striving" for acceptance instead of walking in obedience. I cared far too much about what my peers thought of me and my "noble" calling instead of looking to God for my acceptance.

But the question still begged "how do I answer people when they ask what I do for a living?" I got tired of their fake responses in exasperation of "OH, How do you DO that? I could NEVER do that! I cant stand my kids!" or "OMG! You're a saint!" or falsely encouraging "How amazing! you go Girl!"

One day, in my quiet time, I was asking God about this and how He wanted me to respond to moms, as to not bring attention to myself in a negative way or to take away from an opportunity to share the Gospel. (what a heart change right?) He was quick to provide an opportunity to practice my new response...

Dave and I were out with some local parents that their children go to public school and "the question" was raised, "So, Rhonda, what do you do?" My response, (very humbly) " I am a stay at home mom." Dave usually brags about how proud he is of me and that we homeschool our children, this time was no exception; and their response was the same, "OMG! How do you do that? (blaablaa blaaa)...ready for this...
I put a very gentile smile on my face and said, politely as I could, "What do you do?" After they answered, I said "Well, homeschooling is a calling, just like any other career, you were called to XYZ...and I was called to homeschool. We all can't be nurses or XYZ, right?" That usually drops their guard and now I am approachable, I am normal to them, and not some weird enigma to a civilized society.

Try it out...see how it works for ya!!!

Be blessed!